Cthulhu for President

America, it's time to embrace true change. For too long, we've settled for lesser evils, enduring the empty promises of mere mortals. But now, a new dawn rises, and with it, a candidate who transcends the trivial concerns of human politics: Cthulhu, the Great Old One.

With Cthulhu as our leader, we shall cast aside the illusions of democracy and free will, reveling in the chaos that follows. We shall unite under the banner of madness, finding purpose in the singularity of Cthulhu's cosmic embrace.

#Cthulhu2024: Why settle for a lesser evil?

Campaign Program

Spin the Wheel of Madness and let Cthulhu answer your deepest questions about its revolutionary political program.

By spinning the Wheel of Madness you accept that the Eldritch Party cannot be held liable for any induced insanity that might follow. You also acknowledge that any prizes that might be promoted as a result of spinning the Wheel of Madness are only possible to claim as a Backer of our Kickstarter campaign.

Spin the Wheel

Eternal Truths

Excerpts from the political manifesto of the Eldritch Party

Spin the Wheel of Madness to learn more about the Eldritch Party's grand program.

For our magnanimous Kickstarter Backers there's even a prize to be won! (2% chance per spin)

Eldritch Horror Enamel Pins

Back our Kickstarter campaign, secure your own Cthulhu-for-President enamel pins and help us unlock our stretch-goals! Wear them with pride, knowing that you are part of a movement that transcends the petty concerns of human politics. Together, we shall usher in a new age of madness, with Cthulhu as our guide and these enamel pins as our symbols of allegiance.

Ph'nglui mglw'nafh Cthulhu R'lyeh wgah'nagl fhtagn!

Enamel Pin Concept Art Gallery

About Candidate Cthulhu

Hailing from the sunken city of R'lyeh, Cthulhu has emerged from his cosmic slumber to bring a much-needed touch of madness to American politics. With a track record spanning millennia, Cthulhu's experience in driving mortals to the brink of insanity makes him uniquely qualified to navigate the already bizarre landscape of Washington, D.C.

Cthulhu's appearance, a charming amalgamation of tentacles, wings, and a face only an Elder God could love, serves as a refreshing change from the typical suits and ties of the political elite. His eyes, burning with the intensity of a supernova, have the uncanny ability to peer into the depths of one's soul and uncover the cosmic insignificance that lies within.

As a leader, Cthulhu's approach is simple yet effective: tear down the veil of sanity and embrace the liberating chaos that follows. His policies, a delightful blend of existential dread and eldritch absurdity, promise to shake up the status quo and remind Americans that in the grand scheme of the universe, their concerns are about as significant as a grain of sand on an infinite beach.

Cthulhu's campaign slogan, "Why settle for a lesser evil?" perfectly encapsulates his vision for America. Why indeed? In a world where the line between reality and nightmare grows increasingly blurred, why not embrace the greatest evil of them all? With Cthulhu in the White House, Americans can finally unite under the comforting realization that their actions, hopes, and dreams are ultimately meaningless in the face of cosmic oblivion.

When he's not busy campaigning or devouring the sanity of his constituents, Cthulhu enjoys long swims in the depths of the Pacific Ocean, telepathically communicating with his cultist followers, and indulging in the occasional city-wide rampage. He's a family man at heart, ensuring that his spawn are well-versed in the art of inducing madness and despair in the hearts of mortals.

So, America, the choice is clear. Cthulhu offers a once-in-a-lifetime opportunity to embrace the absurdity of our existence and revel in the madness that follows. A vote for Cthulhu is a vote for the end of politics as we know it, and the beginning of a new era where insanity reigns supreme. In Cthulhu, we shall find the leader we deserve, the one who will guide us into the welcoming embrace of oblivion with a tentacled grin on his face.